an addict in my representaion

a bout a week and a half ago, i was so bored and so disperate to force myself to sleep. the temperature is too high and all my sweat were pouring like spring out of my body. i got up and grab my guitar. i strum, then i created a cycle of chords. then i keep on humming as my left fingers shifted from one chords to another. it was so unexpected of me to think of a song that voices out the feeling of an someone disowned by the people's contructed norms.

within an hour, the song was already completed. i wrote it in tagalog because using the vernacular or the language of our own would make me feel the meaning of the song and if people listen to it, they would feel the veracity of the message it transpires.

i hope one of these days, i will have a video in you tube. and here it goes:

Biglang nagising
Sa mundo ng Patalim
Nakapikit, nangangapa
Ninais na mahanap
Ang liwanag na kay ilap
Kailan kaya, makikita
Ako'y pagod na
Buhay walang kwenta
Gusto kung magbago ngunit paano
Hinanap kita,
Inay nasaan ka?
'Kaw na gagabay
S'yang wala pa


C1:

Gusto kung tumakbo
Ngunit hinihigop
Pabalik sa buhay
Na usok ang kalaro
Naghanap ng kakampi
Hindi makaintindi
Kung sinong kailangan
Wala naman


Ako'y humiling
Na sana'y mahalin
Ako'y may puso
At damdamin
Kahit nawawala
Kami'y humihinga
Tingin sa 'mi'y hangal
Pero kami banal
Ayokong mamatay
Na kinamumuhian
Yapak ko'y 'wag susundan
'Do tutularan


C2:
Gusto kung lumayo
Sa buhay na kay gulo
Takas doon, taks dito
Parang isanf pusa
Hindi mamatay-matay
Ganyan talaga
Ang masamang damo


Coda:
Mga kabataan
'Wag magpakalulong
Ang minsanang tikiman
"Di mapigilan
"Wag kayong maawa
Sa isang pariwara
Hanap ko'y
Kalinga at pang-unawa..